


who will hold me when it's midnight and you're gone

by makemelovely



Category: Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Drunk Dialing, F/F, Implied/Referenced Sexual Content, Past Relationship(s), Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-05-31 14:27:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15121403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makemelovely/pseuds/makemelovely
Summary: AJ leaves, and Paige feels a bit like she’s in a dream, and she’s drowning.//or the one where AJ leaves the pieces of Paige's heart on the dirty floor of some arena in a town Paige doesn't know the name of.





	who will hold me when it's midnight and you're gone

AJ leaves, and Paige feels a bit like she’s in a dream, and she’s drowning.

 

* * *

 

 

_“You’re leaving.” Paige says. It’s a statement, not a question. She ignores the way her heart is shredding, and the pieces lay at AJ’s feet like pretty pink ribbons._

 

_AJ nods, dark eyes serious. “I’m leaving.” The words are a shock deep somewhere in Paige, but at surface level she knew this._

 

_“So what’s the next step?” She asks the girl she loves. She needs to know where they stand, needs to know if she needs to buy ice cream and liquor tonight._

 

_AJ smiles, and it’s sad. Paige knows then that they aren’t going to stay intact. She hates her then, hates her fiercely with the power of a thousand burning suns. How could she do this, Paige wonders, how could she ruin them? “I’m leaving.” AJ repeats, as if that’s the answer Paige is looking for, as if that’ll answer the fucking question. It stings that it really is an answer Paige understands._

 

 _“So that’s it?” Paige hates the bitterness in her voice, and she hates how it’s radiating off of her. She never wanted to be the girl who doesn’t accept the break up but she’s put her whole_ heart _into this. She’s put everything in her and more into keeping this relationship thriving and healthy and wonderful. “We’re done. After everything we’ve been through you’re saying this is it?”_

 

 _AJ’s eyes shine with unshed tears, and Paige wants to hold her even though it’s not her place. Not anymore, as of two fucking minutes ago. “I know this life, Paige. I can’t see someone only once a month while you’re home. I can’t do it. I will_ not _do it.”_

 

_“Okay.” Paige nods to herself angrily, bitterness etched into her skin. Resentment floods her body, and she thinks it’s welling up through her skin like some kind of shield, built in and ready to be used at her body’s command. Paige looks up at AJ through blurry vision, tears bright in her eyes even as she bites down hard on her lower lip to try to keep the flow of tears at bay. “Okay, yeah. Guess I’ll just fuck off then.” Paige heads for the door, heart in her throat when she feels AJ’s impossibly warm hand on her arm._

 

_“Paige-” she hears, but it’s not a gentle, loving Paige. It’s not an apology, not an overturned decision. It’s pity, a sad kind of pity that lurks in the corner of your lips and tears you down, down, down and watches while you sink._

 

_Paige doesn't turn around. “I’ll see you at Mania, AJ. Then I guess I won't see you again.” It’s cold, and harsh, but Paige needs AJ to let her alone. To let her deal with her fucking feelings by herself because AJ sure as hell won't be helping anything. Paige opens the door of the spacious closet, and walks away from the only girl she’s ever really loved. The door thuds shut behind her, and it absently reminds Paige of a metaphor._

 

_Maybe this time Paige’ll choose herself._

 

* * *

 

 

Paige avoids everyone for a month, ignoring the simpering words she gets from Alicia and the hypocritical bullshit that the Bella Twins spew.

 

She comes back with thicker eyeliner and a sharper smile, and ignores the gossip about how she got shitfaced and got an Uber to drive her all the way to AJ’s house. It gets more elaborate the more it gets spread around, and a casual comment to Nattie about how nice New Jersey is this time of year gets the gossip girls blown up.

 

Paige smirks, and for the first time in awhile, feels victorious.

 

* * *

 

 

_Paige didn't mean to sleep with AJ. Really. She just got too drunk one night, and found herself asleep in AJ’s bed the next morning. AJ made eggs and bacon and pancakes. Paige took a shower and muttered obscenities under her breath when AJ asked her to grab a new pair of shorts in her bag and she found the Divas Championship._

 

_“So,” AJ starts sweetly, leaning across the counter. Paige warily eyes her, the familiar glint of mischief has taught her to be wary of itty bitty brunettes with killer smiles and wicked gleams. “Are we gonna fuck again tonight?” AJ asks bluntly, giggling when Paige chokes on the fruit she was eating._

 

 _Paige narrows her eyes, annoyed with the smile on AJ’s face. She looks like she’s won something, and Paige_ hates _losing. “No.” She pretends to frown, loving the absolutely miserable look that came across AJ’s face. “We’re gonna do it now.” Paige leans forward, burying her face in AJ’s neck and going to town. She scooped AJ onto the counter, and stepped between the brunette’s legs._

 

_It became a regular occurrence after that._

 

* * *

 

 

“I heard about you and AJ.” Naomi offers as a greeting, and Paige wants to punch her in the face.

 

“So?” Paige asks, lower lip jutting out petulantly.

 

“So I’m sorry to hear that. You looked happy with her.” Naomi says kindly.

 

Paige scoffs, turning hurt and dangerous eyes to the black woman beside her. “Piss off.” She says slowly, clearly. “You know _nothing_ about either of us, so keep your nose out of my fucking business.” Paige hisses, a familiar flame burning bright in her stomach.

 

Naomi nods, sympathy bright in her dark eyes. “It wasn't my intention to make you feel bad, Paige. Just wanted to lend you an ear. My mama always says to lend one if you got one, and, well, I’ve got two.”

 

Naomi leaves then, and Paige’s flame dims a little bit.

 

* * *

 

 

_Their first date is in a hotel room, AJ’s specifically. They curl into each other beneath the sheets, soft and sweet. They face each other, matching smiles on their faces. “You’re beautiful.” Paige whispers, cheeks flushing when she realizes what she’s said._

 

_AJ laughs, eyes shining at Paige. “You’re a sap.” She teases, adjusting her body. Her leg moves from under Paige to over her, and her arm shifts away from Paige’s shoulder, leaving it cold._

 

_“You love it.” Paige murmurs breathlessly. She doesn't want to leave this bubble of warmth and contentment._

 

_“I love it.” The words send chills down Paige’s spine, and she’s pretty sure her heart grows three sizes. A knock on the door startles them, but then AJ slides out of bed and into a hotel robe. Paige waits for AJ to come back, and when she does come back it’s with a rolling metal cart. “Room service!” She sing-songs, smile obnoxiously large._

 

_Paige wants to protest, but her stomach growls and she relents. “Yeah, okay.” They settle down, pancakes and French toast and waffles in their lap. They get syrup on their skin, and they laugh as they lick it off each other._

 

_Their first official date is at a fancy restaurant, and they make out in the parked car for twenty minutes before going inside. Paige worries that her dress is too short, and AJ helpfully reassures her that it totally is but hey, AJ likes how good she looks in it. They get wine because they’re fancy bitches, and AJ looks stunning in her black dress even as she’s pretending to be a walrus with French fries._

 

_Paige leaves the restaurant and feels like she’s overflowing with affection, even as the waiter scowls after them._

 

* * *

 

 

Paige gets drunk. She’s at a shitty bar where she’s hoping no one will recognize her. She’s had four tequila shots, one and a half beers, and a _lot_ of whiskey. It’s AJ’s favorite bar drink, and Paige downs another glass because _fuck_ AJ, no really fuck her. Paige deserves better, she does. She takes another glass of whiskey to cancel out the little voice whispering in her mind “ _But there’s nobody better than AJ.”_ and maybe she should find a problem with that statement, but the thing is, it's true. It's so fucking true that it would sting if she wasn't so drunk. Tequila really does solve anything.

 

Paige stumbles away from the barstool, laughing gleefully when her elbow knocks against her half full beer bottle and sends it crashing to the floor. “Whoops!” She shouts, snickering to herself as her hands dive into her pockets for her phone.

 

She stumbles outside away from the shouting bartender, and ignores the bite of the night air. Her cold fingers shakily find the first person her speed dial, and Paige waits for her to pick up the phone.

 

“Paige?” AJ asks apprehensively.

 

Paige perks up, voice bright and slightly slurred. “AJ! Hey, AJ, it’s me your ex-girlfriend Paige.”

 

AJ sighs, and Paige wonders if she made her mad. “Yeah, Paige, I know who you are. You’re the only person I know with an English accent.”

 

Paige nods, and doesn't quite realize AJ can't see it. “Right, right. Well I just called to tell you something.”

 

A silence, long and awkward while AJ waits for Paige to speak, and vice versa. “Well?” AJ mutters impatiently, stomach twisted into knots.

 

“I love you.” And then Paige starts crying. “I _really_ fucking love you, AJ. So goddamn much it hurts my heart that you’re gone. Why’d you leave me when I love you so much?” Paige takes a moment to wipe her eyes and steady her breathing. “I love you.” She finishes, and waits for AJ’s response.

 

* * *

 

 

 _Their first_ I love you _is said after their millionth, kind of repetitive match. AJ had won, and Paige had promptly flipped her shit._

 

_Afterwards, Paige made her way to her girlfriend, and she squeezed her sweaty partner into a huge hug._

 

_“You were amazing!” Paige gushes, face buried in her girlfriend’s neck._

 

 _“Psh, me?_ You _were the one who totally killed it. It was insane. That kick, and then the way you sold my leap from the top rope? Gold, baby, pure gold.” AJ says happily, secure and safe. Somewhere, Nikki Bella is weaseling her way into the title picture._

 

_Paige flushes proudly, cheeks burning pink. “Thanks, pumpkin. I adore working with you, it’s fantastic.”_

 

_AJ smiles. “I agree. I’m going to hit the showers, but afterwards I was thinking we could have some fun.” AJ waggles her eyebrows suggestively, and Paige chortles._

 

_“Definitely. See you soon, love you.” Paige turns and almost walks away before her words echo around in her brain. “Um,” she starts, but she knows she’ll never finish her sentence._

 

_AJ’s eyes are wet, and Paige begins to wonder if she’s screwed up the absolutely best thing in her life. “I love you too.” AJ breathes, and Paige almost dies right there._

 

_AJ showers, they head to the hotel, and they spend the night between the sheets whispering I love yous to each other. The first of many._

 

* * *

 

 

“I love you too.” AJ says, softly, sadly, but, most importantly, _sincerely._ It’s the last one AJ will ever tell her.

 


End file.
